"Why, hello mister Lake. How are you this fine
evening?" crowed the man who walked up to the banks of the
night-darkened water. "Do you know what I just did? No, of
course you don't. Even Lakes don't have ESP. Why so blue,
dear Lake? Oh, I guess that you are more black now, aren't
you?" and he laughed crazily out loud, almost falling over
with the force of his guffaws. "Why, it seems that a small
fish has died within your stomach, and floated gracelessly
to your surface. Or, was its death your fault? Is that so?
Good for you. I like a Lake that knows what it likes, and
doesn't like. Ah, yes, your depths do look quite inviting,
but I'm just fine out here on dry land. Does that tree
drink from you? Just give me the word, and you won't have
to worry about him anymore... Well, if you say so. You are
a big Lake, aren't you. Not a pansy little pond or puddle.
This is a full-fledged Lake! A swim? I don't know. I
don't swim all that well, and I doubt that I could even
reach your other shore. Well I don't care if you don't get
very deep, I don't want to. I said no! I can see that
there is a slight cover of algae on your ... is that south
... your south corner. Does it tickle? You don't have any
snakes within you, do you? I hate snakes. Scare me to
death. Yes, your water does look quite inviting, and, yes,
it is a bit warm out tonight. Maybe I'll just get my feet
wet. Just roll up my pants and take off my shoes, and wash
my hands off. If you don't mind, of course. Splendid!
Oooh, you are much colder than I expected, but tolerable.
Yes, I suppose I could go a bit deeper, if you insist. But
only up to my waist. Understand? Is that a snake I see?
You said no snakes! Are you sure it isn't? Well, if it was
a snake, it wouldn't be poisonous, would it? No, of course
not. No poisonous snakes in these parts..."
Tyler Jones, September 7, 1990